Journey Begins

Its 3:40 am in my homeland I am sitting in a lounge in transit half sleepy ,tired exhausted when I could have easily slept in my cozy bed in Kolkata no I am not here on a business trip or a client onsite .Its a trip on which  I have spent most of my savings it’s a  self-paid trip in quest for knowledge. I am 27 years 7 months and few days old and I don’t know what would you say I am old or young my mother says I am still young for some people I am already of age where I should be getting ready to  reproduce coz I am on the threshold of getting too old to give birth to healthy offspring. So now coming back to the reason what made me not take a home loan or a small car and live a happy content life It lies in the fact that How I treat life.

I am a woman with loads of tantrums Life hardly makes me content but then I had been a all smiling happy person throughout my life. Born a woman in a small town in an ordinary middle class family I hardly had exposure to the outside world never been to any of the esteemed school or given a proper kind of guidance and I never was happy I complained all the time and as slowly I grew up from this little girl who would actually declare in her girls group at the age of 15 that’s its ok to have sex before marriage if you are aware of the consequences  which made me almost an outcast J. I was rebuked by my peers for wearing sleeveless top to college and talking in English yes that’s true. Nothing  has changed no matter what we scream or shout woman has some definite decorum to maintain and that been there for centuries  workplace was not much better coz no matter where u work  the people define the workplace being a woman wanting indefinite freedom I suffered there to being constantly eyed as an outcast or rather Rebel  not everyone was bad some were confused I still remember people not understanding my reasons for not putting vermillion or being religious.

I know my society calls me Extravagant because I take men as equal not as a money lending machine I am not a bra burning feminist because I can’t carry a 30 kilo baggage a guy does or stop tears when seeing an emotional movie. My only fault is that I can’t just be instructed to do things .I  still don’t  understand the point of woman depending on the opinion of husbands to choose their wardrobe or do things. I feel funny when people say your husband ALLOWED you to do something?  I guess vice versa is true guys would know better .Yes I am an extravagant woman because I still watch super hero movies with same enthusiasm and love buying electronic gadgets over ornaments and make up I still want to look good in my mirror so that I feel confident when I walk down the street I don’t curse my in-laws day in day out because I have better work to do rather interfere in their lives and wear a saree to their place because acceptance should come for the way you are.

Life is a journey and I want to live it like the way I want to not by what society has decided for me.I am a coward because I couldn’t fight any longer.  I felt like a that tree which was outgrowing in that small pot and needed to be moved to a place where it can spread its roots. 

So here I am sitting on the 9^th floor of an apartment pouring my heart out while my potatoes are struggling in the pressure cooker. I know there are many extravagant men and woman out there trying to break free. No matter how much you claim being Different is normal because we all are but the society grills us to make us a herd of cattle and in that process we are long dead before we actually are.

I am here again on a voyage and I am lucky enough to be the captain of my ship ready to face the open sea.